The Simple Joy Of Living From A Grateful Heart

"If you look to others for fulfillment,
you will never truly be fulfilled.

If your happiness depends on money,
you will never be happy with yourself.

Be content with what you have;
rejoice in the way things are.

When you realize there is nothing lacking,
the whole world belongs to you."

-Lao Tzu

"God's Will Works In Marvelous Ways"

It happened again - out of nowhere. Those situations that present themselves so very unexpectedly! But why? Why now? Is their a lesson to be learned... again?

Many times throughout my life certain individuals would appear during my day from "out of the blue" - an old friend, a past lover or a previous business colleague. Generally, someone that I have been out of touch with for quite some time. At first, we share our hello's and begin catching up on how things have been since we saw each other last. At the same time, deep within myself, I wonder what does it all mean. The universe does work in mysterious ways.

Today, it is my choice to believe that I am guided through all my affairs. That god's grace places people in my life to move me towards my destiny. It's important for me to stay focused and aware as to my part in the process. Remembering to perform god's will over mine each and every moment of the day. Only then will I see and experience the importance, with the help of others, of the bigger journey that I am on.

Tonight was no exception. I received emails from two previously employees that I have not spoken to or communicated with for numerous years. My first feeling was that of surprise - I recalled the many embarassing situations that I had placed many members of my practice staff in during those years. I revisited my past, for only a moment, to honor the recognition of the times then and the life of today. The emails expressed feelings of honor and support. Expressing their feelings of how they remember an individual during a dark time of their life. Overwhelmed by the words of sincere encouragement - I found myself pausing as to ask my soul to guide me as to what I should do with this unfolding situations.

How do I respond? Immediately I recall the importance of the principles I live by - honesty, hope, faith, courage, discipline, perserverence, service, humility, willingness, brotherhood of man, and the presence of god. Oh, how my soul can guide me if I get out of the way. Those thoughts in my head making things more complicated as my "ego" works me over asking all kinds of questions that will ultimately bring about anger and FEAR! Stay with my heart - I tell myself for there lies all my answers to what's right in me.

I pause - take some time to ask for direction - for guidance from my heart. What shall I say? I begin to feel peace as the clarity of situation unfolds. I begin to write down those words that come freely from my heart. It get easier and easier. Wow - once again god's grace brings the calm I seek. I remain unclear as to the lesson that I should come away from the experience. I understand that perhaps I will never know... But perhaps, just perhaps, it will become apparent to me when once again the time is right and god works his will for me in the most special way again! Until then - live in the moment and feel the wonder of the universe.

Say When It's Too Much Compassion

Sometimes, it's easy to step across that line and have too much compassion for the people in our lives. Although compassion is good, too much compassion can cripple the people we're trying to love. We understand so clearly how they feel that we don't hold them accountable for themselves. Too much compassion can hurt us too. We can wind up feeling victimized by and resenting the people we're experiencing too much compassion toward. We're so worried about their feelings that we neglect our own.

"Too much compassion means we don't believe in others enough to let them do what they need to do to help themselves. It's a way of telling them, "You can't." Your can't handle your reality. you can't learn your lessons. You can't handle the truth, so I'll treat you like a helpless child.

Too much compassion can leave us prey to victimization and manipulation. We're so worried about how the other person feels that we neglect to take care of ourselves.

Here are some guidelines about compassion.

• If we're creating a problem for ourselves to solve someone else's dilemma, we're probably crossed the line.
• If we're so worried about another person's pain that we're neglecting our own emotions, we've probably over-involved. If guilt is the underlying motive for our behavior, maybe what we're practicing isn't compassion. The lesson here isn't to stop caring about others. Instead, we need to respect other people's right to learn their own lessons.

Too much of anything isn't a good thing. If we've crossed that line into too much compassion, we can step back into the safe zone and use a lighter touch. "

More...Language of Letting Go
Melody Beattie
May 9th
Pages 145-146

Miracles Can Happen

To realize a miracle is happening, one needs to believe that it is possible. Today I truly believe that miracles occur in all aspects of my life.

At exactly 5:30PM on May 6, 2009 - a miracle that stated back in May of 2004 came full circle. Never could I have imagined that the circumstances in my life then would ever have led me to this day. Even in my most outrageous dreams could I ever believe that the result of a phone call today could ever happen.

You ask what?

On May 12, 2004 - a series of event would begin to occur. Angels began appearing in my life, although at the time they were dressed in costumes. Months would eventual pass - day after day, it was suggested to dig deep into my soul. The honesty of who I was, regardless of how bitter it tasted at the time, would become more and more apparent to me. Many days I didn't want to acknowledge it's truth. It was, I thought, easier to live in denial of the life's reality. Fortunately, that was not a choice at the time. A battle was being waged against myself - a sick mind was to be restored and recovered back to health - a miracle was in the making.

At first, I was told how being alive was a miracle. I didn't really feel it at the time, but I listened anyway. Hurdle after hurdle, I was taught to believe that only a miracle could have brought me to this point. Still, I didn't feel it in my heart! Then one day - things began to change. Awakening occurred... I came to realize that I could not have been able to reach that phase of my quest without some help from above. Yes - for the first time - I truly felt that I was capable of being a miracle. I couldn't explain it - I came to realize that I wouldn't be able to. Thus started my journey into hope and faith.


Anything in god's world is possible.

"BE DO BE, not DO BE DO" - The Secret of Elite Performance

I have shared in the past about the moments of enlightenment I've had over these past five years. I thought from living these wonderful experiences that produce tremendous insights, I would be able to master being in this state of presence all the time by getting more of it, if I were to work on it more, have more therapy, attend more support meetings, be a part of more groups, received more training - JUST OBTAIN MORE...

I used to think enlightenment was all about getting yourself ready to act the part. Most people have given up believing they can make a difference and have sold their souls for the comfort of enough pieces of silver to satiate themselves with life in consumer paradise. This is ultimately unsustainable.

As Joseph Campbell said "people build the ladder of success to find they've placed it against the wrong wall". Joseph Riggio calls this "structural illformedness". In essence, I thought I had to be doing stuff that got me to feel the way I wanted to be rather than starting with myself and being the way I want to be first. As Joseph says it's "BE DO BE, not DO BE DO :-)." Now I don't NEED to be the person centre stage - I get MUCH more satisfaction BEING ME. One of the key secrets to elite communicators is that they're NOT "doing a performance" as in NOT being genuine or authentic and just acting as if. What they are doing is being themselves, open, authentic, being vunerable and sharing themselves, their real humanness with others. This, for those that have the courage to do this generates the charisma that is magnetically attractive. But this is not for everyone, as I said it takes courage to step up.

I actually don't want to work with every client that comes to my coaching practice. Most people want their solution to match how they have defined their problem. A nice easy safe answer, a band-aid, sticking-plaster, not a cure or shift. A painful change for the time being - most likely to not be repeated when the same situation should arise once again in the near future.

I work with people who start building the structural wellformedness. From here it's not a question of techniques to "not stutter" - it's just not doing the old patterns which are usually about where tension is held.

As I have "came to believe", I could still "stutter" if I wanted to, but instead I've gone where the problem is NOT so that's not who I am any more.

Got Goals?

Do you have clear goals for this new year? Are you wondering how to achieve your goals? Good solid plans and a foundation for success will help you create life and business on your terms. It's never to late...

Here are 10 steps to set and achieve meaningful goals. The Ten Steps to Success can be used over and over, whenever it's time to chart your course again.

Steps to Success

1 - Clear the decks. It is important to release negative energy caught up in past events. Say goodbye to past mistakes, frustrations, or disappointments and keep your focus on now. In order to reach new goals, you will need all the positive energy you can muster!

2 - Create a Vision. A vision for your life is like a magnet pulling you forward. A clear and meaningful vision is essential to staying motivated and focused. This is your dream, purpose, and mission you know you want to live. It is important to be able to see it, feel it, taste it and know it is possible for you. Write it, draw it, collage it, sing it, whatever keeps it alive!

3 - Prioritize. From your vision, decide what aspects are most important. For example: If your vision includes several new business projects, create a priority list starting with the project that you are most passionate about.

4 - Set definite goals. Achievable goals are reasonable and specific. They are written down, and specify what, when, and how. Create deadlines, detailed steps, visible reminders, daily reviews, and consistent action. This takes time, but it’s critical to getting the results you want. Remember the carpenter's rule for increasing effectiveness, "Measure twice. Cut once".

5 - Commit. What does commitment to your goals mean to you? Do you think of drudgery, or excitement? Success over the long term stems from a commitment that is grounded in excitement. Read your vision every day to keep the excitement fresh.

6 - Create a Foundation for Success. Increase your chances for success by including a plan for each of the following:

• Mind Management – Take charge of your thinking. Negative thinking is like an anchor when you are trying to move forward into new territory. Write out positive, confident beliefs and thoughts that you will entertain for your success, and read them frequently.


• Time Management – Schedule your time for effectiveness, and be accountable to the actions you have planned. Don't overcommit and curb your time wasters. Use a calendar


• Emotion Management – What helps you get back on track when you experience disappointment, discouragement, or doubt? Set up a support system of friends, peers, service providers, and a good self care program so that you bounce back quickly. Be sure to include fun and humor as part of the process in reaching your goals.


• Environment management – How will you handle all the distractions? The phone calls, e-mail, noise, too many ideas in your own mind? It pays to address each potential distraction with concrete action. For example, if you find that responding to e-mail is a time thief and reduces your productivity, select a reasonable amount of time to respond to e-mail, schedule it, and stick to it!


• Gremlin management – Gremlins are everything else within your own make up, the patterns and behaviors that get in the way of your success. Procrastination is one of the most familiar to all of us. With mindfulness and conscious attention to your thinking and actions, you can change old habits. If you need help making a change, try coaching. Don’t let anything stop you!

7 - Take action. Each goal can be broken down into small steps. Think about each long term goal and “rewind the tape” in your mind. How did you get there? What steps did you take? Write down the steps, put them on your calendar in such a way that each task can reasonably be accomplished.

8 - Evaluate and Revise. This is very important! Schedule a review session each week where you look at your results so that you may:

• Learn from mistakes


• Celebrate successes (no matter how small)


• Revise plans if needed

9- Keep the faith. Who or what will you call on to remind you of your greatness and your ability to reach your goals? Support Group? Inspirational Books? Friends? Peers? Life Coach? Be prepared to use these resources.

10 - Use the Steps to Success process whenever you set a new goal. It is my hope that this outline will help you create your vision for the new year.

Ready, Set, Action!

Happiness

Look to this day!

For it is life, the very life of life.

In its brief course

Lie all the verities and realities of your existence:

The bliss of growth,

The glory of action

The splendor of achievement,

For yesterday is but a dream

And tomorrow is just a vision,

And today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness

And every tomorrow a vision of hope.

Look well, therefore to this day!

Such is the salutation to the dawn.

Kalidasa

Life is GOOD. BE HAPPY!

The Peaceful Calm Within My Heart

Finding the balance and peace in one's life is a responsibility. The responsibility that has been provided to us by grace, and I believe, to be cherished and upheld within our hearts. This responsibility moves us to create and sustain the life we dream about. It's not to be taken lightly or intentionally sabotaged. It's to be nourished in everything we do. Yet during many moments of our day, when challenged by overwhelming circumstances, we can ultimately behave in a manner that can poison our desired sense of calm. We act as if to dismiss its importance in our lives by simply overlooking how our co-dependent behaviors destroy the feelings of being close to our souls.

Why does situations in my life get so out of hand? Is it the people I associate with? Is the way I'm pushed to behave or respond because of the people I interact with during my day? Is it because their are so many crazy people in the world that seemingly show up in front of me during my journey through life? Could it be that no one understands that I have the best course of action the majority of the time and will not listen to reason? What's a person to do - all I want is to be peaceful throughout my day and enjoy the beauty of living...

The lessons for many of us does not originate in how we can change others or avoid others during our day. It starts within us! The importance of understanding this manner of living is underscored by this wonderful saying that has become a intregal part of my daily living.

"Grant me the serenity to accept the things I can

not change, the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference."

My approach to living a peaceful life starts with my responsibility to create it. It is a privledge gifted to us, either to empower or abuse, based on our daily maintainence of our spiritual presence and shared during our interactions with others. It is to be cared for as a parent loves a newborn baby. It is be exercised - becoming part of our spiritual awareness in all the aspects of our daily happenings.

My understanding of peace has evolved over the years. Initially believing that when there is not anything happening - peace will follow. My understanding today is much different. By allowing the presence of peace to be felt each and every day - even when life comes calling like a hurricane. Many morning throughout the week I'm reminded of this quest to finding peace in all that I experience by reading a meditative phrase written by an unknown author...

Peace... it does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart.

What a wonderful way to start my day!

The Power of Intent - Thought Manifests as Word

The realization that the power of my thoughts lead to the words I use to communicate to other and subseqently affects the behaviors I display was a relatively new concept to me back in 2004. I trusted that all that I observed without question - believing that what I interpreted to be going on was only as I saw it. It later became clear to me that my perceptions - either accurate or delusional - DID affect every single relationship in my life.

"Self-centeredness - that is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invaiably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a postion to be hurt."

It was never more evident than with the interactions with my family and friends. Time and time again, being judgemental concerning the situations happening in my and others lives, I would conclude that things were right or wrong based on my perceptions. My life was a journey to avoid the "wrongs" and accepts and approve the "rights" in any given situation of myself and others. Never did it cross my mind that knowing right from wrong was beyond my own personal slanted perceptions. Today, right from wrong does not have the impact as it did in the past. Practicing being non-judgemental - as described by Don Migual Ruiz in the "Four Agreements" has allowed me to realize that I can relate to all the experiences that my friends and family go through and how I've gone throught them in a similiar fashion in my life also.

The power of the words that I use today - owning them with honesty - have had an immense impact on how I feel about myself and how I see and relate to other. Channeling my thoughts through prayer and meditation has helped guide my thoughts from disease negative thinking to positive inspiring action. Those couple of seconds before responding to a question or statement, has provided me the awareness to understand that the words I am about to choose should be choosen carefully and expressed with love not hate. Whatever I say, it must be accurate and honest - takes on a new meaning today. I must own my words and take responsibility for them. I do not have the right to say whatever I may want to say without realizing that the gift of speech is not one to be taken lightly. I must be held to what I say.

This undertanding is most obvious to me in the insight provided by Mahatma Gandhi (1869–1948) - the political and spiritual leader of India.

Keep your THOUGHTS POSITIVE because
your thoughts BECOME YOUR WORDS.

Keep your WORDS POSITIVE because your
words BECOME YOUR BEHAVIORS.

Keep your BEHAVIORS POSITIVE because
your behaviors BECOME YOUR HABITS.

Keep your HABITS POSITIVE because
Your habits BECOME YOUR VALUES.

Keep your VALUES POSITIVE because
your values BECOME YOUR DESTINY.

Practicing this enlightenment creates consistency in how I now relate to everyone in my life - friends, family and strangers. There is a sense of deeper connection in my interactions - a caring to respect others while respecting myself for who I am. The gift of loving another starts with loving myself. Only when I respect what I say of myself, will I be able to do the same to others. The power of words is meant as an expression of my heart and should not originate in my ego or mind. Happy go I as I speak the truth from my soul...

Reacting vs Responding

From my earliest days growing up I was told that performing tasks quickly and accurately will benefit me during my educational training at college, while implementing my many business objectives during my career, overcoming my daily challenges and obstacles, assisting me in my climb to success, and allowing prosperity in athletic competitions. What they didn't tell me was that sometimes that quick response may lead me to unhealthy decisions that could affect many aspects of my life in the seconds, minutes, hours, days, months and years ahead.

We communicate with others at the speed of light. Conversation start, move quickly through many discussions, each having a degree of impact on who we are. Slow means being left behind or unable to keep up. The power of listening is lost. Allowing ourselves to be breatheless is the norm. Full steam ahead! We formulate our response before another person finishes their sentences. Judging ourselves and others after hearing a single word spoken. Readying ourselves to anticipate the next move or comment swiftly. We pattern ourselves to have all the answers and potenially harmful solutions at the tip of our tongues during our interactions. Standing helpless wondering why life is so complicated and living with the intent to be right all the time with a high degree of perfection in all that we do. Why has being right and knowing any given situation going on become so important in our daily lives? Ahh, our minds feed on us being ahead of others - smarter and more able - to be out in front while leaving everyone behind. Our minds place less importance on our spirtual quality of our lives - more time in the quest to create a hopeless & helpless existence to drive ourselves crazy in success.

What ever happened to slowing down and evaluating how we would like to handle a given situation? How can I respond to given challenges in my daily life that will promote healthy living? The anwser is as easy as breathing - but my mind will tell me that it can not be that easy!

I have now come to realize that NOT making decisions quickly is the starting point to healthier living! Modifing my response by providing myself some time to determine how I might like to proceed has provided me many new opportunities. I now can ask for help from others, appeal to their experiences, sleep on those ideas, and finally formulate the given response that takes into account many aspects of our complicated lives. I find myself not having to apologize for my behaviors as often - being able to make amends when I am wrong and not undergoing a deep sense of guilt or embarassment over statements that I have made or actions that I have taken.

Realizing that I have never really signed up to make myself crazy throughout my life - my ego NOW has taken a back seat - although it still wants to make my life a living hell often - to a more spiritual life of being in the moment. Living in the NOW - experiencing life as an observer without the desire to be right or wrong. Feeling others situations and choosing carefully how I may want to interact or not. Allowing others the space to go in the direction they may need without harming myself in the process and taking others prisoners during my day.

We are gifted at birth with all the spiritual "Wisdom of the Universe".

"All human beings are born with all the wisdom of the universe imprinted on their soul. It is inthe DNA of everything. Indeed, "DNA" could very well be used as an acronym for DivineNatural Awareness. Every living thing has this natural awareness built in. It is part of the system. It is part of the process that you call Life. This is why, when people are confronted with great wisdom, it often sounds so familiar to them. They agree with it almost at once. There is no argument.There is only a remembering. It is part of their Divine Natural Awareness. It is said to be "in their DNA." It feels like, "Ah, yes, of course."

Home with God, Neale Donald Walsch, Page 5

The answers are within us. Trust less our thinking and more on the beacon of insight that has been set aside way to often. Reconnect to the source of energy that will steer us to peace. Allow ourselves the time to ask what is right inside us throughout our day and gratefully accept the many responses that we are privledged to experience in our journeys with others. STOP... BREATHE... BREATHE... BREATHE - RESPOND carefully - feel the peace within us come to the surface!

Letting Go

Today started like many days in the past - my eyes opening - my first thoughts of gratitude for having another day. It was still dark, sun was beginning to rise and the kids were starting to get ready for another day of school. Showers, getting dressed, eating breakfast and driving to the bus stop. But today also started with some sadness. My oldest child was not to go to school today, but prepare for a 15-day trip to Israel. Having never been apart for that amount of time and certainly that distance, I began to worry and wonder how I would be able to help her if she should need it from across the world.

Morning prayer and meditation started my journey for the day. I was reminded of all those lessons I have had to learn to be able to live a life of freedom from the worries that I might create in my mind. Knowing that I must trust the energy of the universe to guide my daughter's journey to the promise land. Additionally, it was about my journey of "letting go".

I live my life with the opportunity to provide guidance and experience to the most precious gifts ever placed into my life - my children. I'm reminded that it is not about telling them how to live but allowing them the opportunity to live their lives. I trust that these experiences that she is about to begin will be as important as the lessons I learn throughout my day also. Both are as important. I seek comfort in knowing that she must also find that inner strength - our souls - to help navigate the direction we are to take on a daily basis. It can not be told to a children - but must be experienced.

We drive to the school to meet all the others traveling today. Smiles, hugs and laughter fill the air. Mothers and fathers walking around anxiously and excited at the same time. Then the time came - kisses and hugs - and more kisses and hugs with tears. They boarded the buses to start their trip to the airport, then boarded the plane, found their seats - and began an experience that will certainly touch upon their souls.

As the day comes to an end, I give thanks for another wonderful day of learning. I'm reminded that I've been placed in this universe to do my very best and provide support and love to all individuals of this world. I'm also reminded that my daughter is in gods hands now... although I realize that she has ALWAYS been in god's hands. It's only been an illusion to believe that she has been in my hands only!